Wednesday, October 30


"Motherhood is a choice you make everyday, to put someone else's happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when your not sure what the right thing is....and to forgive yourself, over and over again, for doing everything wrong." - Donna Ball

We are our own worse critics.   

Everyday I think to myself, what can I do today that will have a positive impact on my son for the future?  What can I do a year, two years, three years from now to ensure that he stays on that path that his Daddy and I pray for?  If he gets in trouble and I yell or punish or him, will he remember that forever?  I have so many plans for Jamison but I know it's him that has to make the decisions to follow that path and if he loses himself along the way, I will be there to pick him up no matter what.

I saw this video this week and it brought tears to my eyes.  When asked to describe themselves as a Mother, I can see where these women look at the negative and don't focus on the positive.  I see how in a Mother's mind it's a constant battle of wits and patience.  That they don't feel that what they're doing is truly enough, but to their child, it's everything they've ever wanted.  And when their children came and were asked what they thought about their Moms their responses were so innocent and their truth.  They have those real raw emotions and can decipher in their minds what's most important.  The littlest thing that you do for your child, like jump on a trampoline or go shopping with them, is something that they will never forget. 

To me, this video puts this awesome thing called Motherhood into perspective.  I know I will make mistakes along the way and that at times I will fail.  I'm not perfect, no one is, and to beat myself up over it will only drive myself crazy.  I need to focus on the time that I do have with him and make it count.  If I make a mistake along the way, that's okay, because I will make up for it with love.  I will make up for it with kisses and hugs, with Mommy/Son dates and lots of laughter.  He will ALWAYS know how much I love him and that everything I do, I do with him in mind. 

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